Of course I’m talking about self love. Turns out Justin Beiber was right! You should go and LOVE YOURSELF.
Loving yourself and loving the way you look, by the way Biebs, IS what’s up! And I would be willing to bet based on all the selfies that I have seen without even following or seeking out the guy, that Beiber likes the way he looks too.
So many of us are taught to self loathe. Constantly picking ourselves apart for any ‘imperfections.’ Hating our weight, our hair, our height, our skin, because it doesn’t measure up to some arbitrary standard. Even judging our intellect, our achievements, our level of success, how much we accomplish as not enough.
The problem is, it never ends. If it’s something we can’t change, we’ll go on criticizing ourselves, well, forever. Which according to Prince is “a mighty long time,” and it seems like a miserable way to live. Even if there is something we can do to change whatever it is we don’t like, we rarely define a measurable endpoint at which we will be satisfied, so we continue beating ourselves up.
Maybe decide it’s time to stop.
Huh? Is that even possible?
It is. It’s a process of course. It starts by making a decision to love and honor yourself like you would a best friend. You might notice that your bestie has gained a few pounds or they aren’t killing it financially, but you wouldn’t shame them about it daily like you do to yourself. If you practice speaking to yourself kindly and celebrating yourself, noticing the things you like about yourself, it becomes second nature.
This is one of the many things I help my clients with in my sex, love and relationship coaching. No one can love us more than we love ourselves, so cultivating deeper self love is a great place to begin.